In a mood

I'm in a mood today.

The excuses are endless, up to early, kids whinning before they were even out of bed, the messy house is driving me nuts.

But really, that's all they are, excuses.

I can't drag my eyes off myself today, can't see past the thoughts rushing through my head.

Trying, failing, and trying again.

I know I need to refocus, take the time to kneel before the One Who can change that focus for me.

Why is it so hard?

All it takes is time, time to sit and be still.

Time to find the words for the thoughts that tumble, the feelings that invade.

And I have that time, but am I willing to use it for what matters?

Today, I haven't been.

And I can tell, I'm sure if you interacted with me today, you could tell too.

Praying for focus, praying to live my life for Him, in view of Him constantly.

It's not easy, that surrendering completely, but it's worth it.

I'm going to make the time today, to shift that perspective, to focus on Him and to not let my thoughts influence my feelings. I want what He wants for my life.

Just needed reminding of that.