Struggles

I am so looking forward to the end of summer....my kids most definately need a break from eachother. They are pushing, pushing, pushing, those lovely buttons (on eachother and Mom!) Today we just needed to get out of the house (it was 8:15am and we'd finished making cookies and the darlings were already starting to annoy one another!)so we went for an hour walk (complete with a stop at the park) and Anthony tricycled (motorcycled as he would correct me) the WHOLE way. I was SO proud of him, he is getting so big. I am excited that he is starting school in a few weeks (and a little nervous for his teacher, as it is a class of mostly boys!) Sorry...rabbit trail :P



Struggling lately with my son's wonderful personality. I know in my heart of hearts that God created him with these great traits (caring, stubborn...er strong-willed, friendly, sensitive, loving, high-energy, independant, inquisitive) for a reason and that one day, they will help him and draw him closer to the One who created him but right now, argh! is all I can say (I'm also sure he has been given these traits to teach me things in teh process of raising him too!). Deliberate disobedience sends me right over the edge, I just can't handle it (there's my need to be in control shining through). And Anthony is testing those limits we have set and there has been just a few (read at least 30) battle of wills in the last week and I am trying so hard to be consistant. Not all the battles I've been fighting have been worth it and I am slowly starting to shift my perspective.....my mantra... "It doesn't MATTER to the big picture if " and it's been helping me re-focus to what matters most.

The last few days have been better, I have been getting up before my kids (sort of....I'm still in bed but I'm awake), so that I can spend time lifiting them up before God (3:30 am appears to be the desired time for this, this week at least). And I have been (mostly) managing to draw on His patience and grace that I need to parent these gifts God has given. I love my kids and I long to be the parent that my kids need and I know that God can change my focus and my heart so that I will be the parent that He wants me to be and that, my friends, makes my heart sing.